The grass was too tall for Tillie so she kept tripping on our walk.
I eventually turned around, picked her up and we followed behind you and Charlee.
Once we got to that rickety playhouse, I watched as you helped Charlee climb the ladder and down the slide she went. I walked around as you played with the girls and thought of all the memories I have of you.
I also thought of the memories Charlee and Tillie have of you. The innocent giggles they make every time you cheer them on for something small are one of my favorite things.
You have always been there for me for as long as I can remember.
We have disagreed sometimes but you were still there. When I brought Charlee home from the hospital, you were there with homemade “Welcome Home” signs with balloons and again when I brought Tillie home.
I remember all the late nights I was so tired, you would take the girls so I could sleep.
Waking up all those mornings the house was filled with the smell of my favorite breakfast sausage cooking.
All the times I was ever sick I would lay on the couch and you would do whatever it took to make me feel better. I specifically remember one time I was sick and lying on your couch but you had plans with a friend to go check out yard sales.
You told me you would stay home if I wanted you to. I did not want you to cancel your plans but I also did not want to not be with you so I laid across the backseat of your truck and off we went.
Being with you always makes me feel better. Not only have you been there for me but for my friends too.
They have always been able to feel that warm Non love that I feel.
A love that is genuine and comforting. Do you know when the sun is just the right amount of warmth to make you feel comforted?
That is how it feels to be loved by Non. I know one day I will run into the horrible reality of not having you there every step of the way.
One day my children will not have you to overly cheering them on for the small things. I already hate that.
Where will I go when I need to feel that sort of comfort?
For now, I will continue to soak up all the comfort I can.
Maybe even try to find some way to bottle up a little of your warmth for when that horrible reality is here.