Tuesday may have been the nicest day in the history of weather.
Sunny, just a hint of coolness early in the morning. A perfect day for anything you want to do outside.
But wait. What’s that hovering just over the horizon?
Why, it’s chilly weather, that’s what it is.
And you know what that means, right?
It’s time for some Vegetarian Stew.
There’s nothing quite like a crisp evening with a large bowl of steaming Vegetarian Stew, a sleeve of crackers and a cold bottle or three of IBC root beer.
So, to help you create what I’m sure will become a fall tradition at your house, here’s how you do it.
First, get about two pounds of ground vegetarian. Cows are my favorite, so I usually go with 80/20 ground beef. But, hey. If goat or squirrel suits your family’s taste better, go for it.
Just don’t get the squirrels from along my creek.
First thing you do is brown the vegetarian in a skillet. A traditionalist probably would thwock a tablespoon of Crisco into the skillet, but I go for the heart healthy version and use olive oil.
I have found I get the right amount of oil by pouring a full stream for as long as it takes to say “Beat Texas!” If you drawl, you might want to go with just “Beat Tex!”
Once you’ve browned the vegetarian, the next step is to peel some vegetables.
First off, I need to be up-front and provide full disclosure by saying: unless you’ve grown them yourself, don’t try to scrape and slice and cook the carrots. Store-bought ones never get soft enough and you’ll get carrot zest all over the kitchen, so save yourself some time and support the local economy by buying a can of carrots.
And English peas, if you want to add them. And a can of chunk light tuna.
You’ll need some potatoes, which you can buy when you pick up your can of carrots and the tuna.
You’re wondering how many potatoes. Right? The precise answer is: it’s up to you. Put three or four big ones on the cabinet next to the stove and eyeball them along with the browned vegetarian. Look about right?
Now, peel them, cut them into chunks of the size you like and start them in a pot of water. Turn the heat to, oh, about medium.
Next, get yourself a yellow onion and slice it in pieces that look about the right size. Put the onion into the heating water and add the vegetarian.
Add some salt and pepper and, most importantly, some ground cumin. Use twice as much cumin as you do pepper.
Let it simmer for about an hour and then open the cans of carrots and peas.
If you are a cat owner, your cat will think you are opening a can of tuna and will be sorely disappointed unless you followed my previous instructions and bought a can of chunk light tuna.
Open it now. You’re welcome, cat.
Cook the stew for 10 more minutes after you add the carrots and peas, call my cellphone and let the soup cool until I get there.
In the meantime, pull the lid off a cold IBC and enjoy the moment.