I was at the OBU RAWC, the school’s auditorium/ gymnasium, for an admitted student day. During the awards ceremony I was sitting next to this girl with curly brown hair. Uncomfortable sitting in silence, I was looking to break the ice, so as always I pulled out my cheese grater, looked her in her brown eyes and said: “OBU is great, but this is a little grater.” She laughed and we talked to pass the time. Seven months later we met again on the first day of our freshman year. I didn’t remember her, but she remembered me and my tiny cheese grater. Everyday for the last three years I’ve carried a tiny cheese grater in my pocket. I use this tool more than any other, multiple times a day.
This cheese grater has completely changed my life and I don’t use it to grate cheese. The cheese grater is about 3 inches tall, and I eagerly seek out opportunities to use it for its intended purpose; telling jokes.
I’ve told this joke all around the world, to hundreds of people. But the crazy thing is, it works! Time and time again people crack up at the unexpected gag. This one joke breaks the ice, gets people to like me, but most importantly it makes me membreable. After three years of this, people still regularly walk up to me and ask “Hey, are you the cheese grater guy?” and as always, yes I am. I make sure to never leave my house without my trusty cheese grater.
I’ll admit, being known as the “Cheese grater guy” can get ‘degrateing,’ but it has its perks. I’ve won scholarships, aced job interviews, and even got a girlfriend with this tool. My first cheese grater was given to me as a gift, from a student minister named Kyle at a church in Dayton, Ohio aka Father Cheese. Father Cheese was known for his iconic joke, the same one he would pass onto me when he gifted one of his cheese graters right before I moved to Poteau, Oklahoma.
While moving to a new town can be stressful, a funny gag like my grater really helped me to build a name for myself and find a place in the brutal world of highschool cliques. Using this cheese grater has drastically boosted my ego to supernatural levels of confidence. I was able to use this joke/tool as a way to break out of my shy highschool shell, and find new friends. I now have a collection of miniature cheese graters. Every day for the past three years I’ve carried my tiny cheese grater, and I don’t see myself ever stopping.