Within three days, most of us will have reset our clocks and voted for president and other influential offices.
Here’s a suggestion for those who would like to be on the ballot next time: You’ll get elected if you promise to do away with Daylight Saving Time.
You won’t have to kiss babies, shake hands or make a single promise except for putting us back on Old Time and swearing to leave us there.
Somebody out there give me an Amen to that. We’ve used Daylight Saving Time at odd times historically, but the current infliction came when Lyndon Johnson signed the Uniform Time Act of 1966 and empowered the Department of Transportation - of all people - to enforce it.
It was not well received. I remember gardeners writing letters to the editor to complain that the extra hour of daylight was burning their tomatoes.
People like my grandparents, who tended to sleep and wake with the chickens, had to stay up far later than ever before and threw off their internal clocks.
Pa Tweedy, grandfather of my best friend, steadfastly refused to adjust a single clock in his house when Big Brother said it was time to set them ahead.
He stayed on Slow Time, as he called it, and waited for the rest of the universe to come back to him in six months.
The time we have right now - Slow Time, Old Time, Regular Time, 4/4 Time or whatever you choose to call it - is what we had until I was 13 years old and everyone seemed happy with it.
If someone wanted to enjoy a little more daylight, they got up earlier and did not need the government’s help to figure that out.
Personally, I get tired of having to change my internal clock twice a year It messes up my biorhythms for no good reason.
So, I’m ready to change it for good. Pick one time - Fast or Slow; Old or New; Waltz or Ragtime - and stick with it.
This would be a great platform for an emerging political party looking to get some centrist support. No one likes Daylight Saving Time, so score some political good will by campaigning to abolish it and then follow through.
I offer this as your slogan: “The Time Is Now!”
Consider it my gift to your efforts. I wish you well and look forward to voting for you.